today i stand.

confronted by my weaknesses.
i am not hardworking. why?
i like to study, but i dont like to memorise. i really dont.
and it has proven very unwise.
i feel so bloody sad today, with my awful Chinese marks.
i mean, there is redemption. that is not the point.
exams are not over, and i can still make sure i do well for it.
but why am i not hardworking?
is it cos i am lazy? they are known as opposites, but still.
is it cos i am not interested?
what am i interested in?
and hedwig's lesson is gonna start.
i need time for reflection. i just do.
wana change.
:(